Friday, December 11, 2009

Am I smoking crack?

The I love you guy called again Monday night and left a really long message apologizing for his behavior the other week. He said it has really been bothering him and he wanted me to know how sorry he was and that wasn't normal behavior for him.
I hate when people don't call me back so my plan was to call him back, tell him I totally understood and that while I had fun going out with him, I don't think we are looking for the same thing out of a relationship right now. It's pretty clear to me he is on a serious wife hunt and I am not interested in being any one's wife (now or possibly ever).
Well...that's not how the call went. Somehow I found myself agreeing to go out with him again. WHAT! Why did I do that? I felt so bad for him that I couldn't bring myself to say we are looking for different things. It's not like I am criticizing him so I don't know why the words would not come out of my mouth. Of course, since I was such a wimp, I am now dreading going out with him on Tuesday. I guess I need to work up the courage to call him and tell him before then or stop complaining about going.

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