1) Never go on a blind date with another couple
2) Always go on 1st dates with an escape plan
3) Don't commit to an entire day blind date (see #2)
4) Dating is exhausting
I didn't realize how exhausting dating was going to be. I am worn out from this week. Right now, I want to lay on the couch and cuddle up with a with a guy who:
I don't have to ask questions to,
tell him about myself,
stress about where he likes me or not, or
worry about if he is going to kiss me, is it going to be awkward, etc
I just want to hang out, cuddle and watch TV. No talking required. I have a feeling that is a long, long way down the road for me, but that's what I what I want right now.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Have I Lost My Mind?
A friend of a friend sent me an email this week asking if I would be interested in going on a date to a UGA game with her best guy friend. Because at this point, I have nothing to lose and want to go on dates, I said yes.
Yes, you heard me. I agreed to go on a blind date that required at a 2 hour car ride each way, a 4 hour football game PLUS tailgating time. This is coming from a person that doesn’t even like for her dates to pick her up so she doesn’t have to talk to them in the car and use up precious conversation pieces on the way to a date and to avoid an awkward ride home if the date sucks.
The date called and followed up in an email. His emails were pretty funny all week so I felt fine about having so many hours to fill for a 1st blind date.
We were going to the game with another couple who were only on their second date so it was bound to be an interesting day. It poured (not hard rain) pouring, at one point I thought we were going to drive through a tornado, the entire drive to Athens. Of course, I didn’t think anything about bringing an umbrella, raincoat, nothing so I am totally unprepared for the weather. Luckily, my date was a total gentleman and prepared with a raincoat for me. He also had my fav beer, orange vodka for mixing with sprite during the game, etc. Because of the weather, we tailgated in the car. We were in a Tahoe with captain’s chairs so it wasn’t too crowded. The conversation was ok on the way up to Athens, not continuous or any crazy connection, but it was fine.
Funny story of the night…I wore thong shoes that had a canvas like bottom. Walking to the stadium was like wading through a river. At one point I looked down and my left shoe had soap suds all over it. I forgot that I had used spray in way to clean the bottom of the shoes and obviously didn’t wash all the spray and wash off. Anyway…it was funny to me but probably a “you have to be there moment.”
Our seats were club level in a box like setting so the weather had no impact on the enjoyment of the game. I am an avid sports fan – especially football, so it was fun to go to the game even though I didn’t have a vested interest in the outcome, plus I had a chance to show off my football knowledge.
All in all, the date was fine and nothing terrible. I was really tired by the end of the game and since it was a night game we didn’t get back to Atlanta until midnight. He was super nice, very funny and a total southern gentlemen but I see myself being friends with him and hanging out more than a romantic interest.
Yes, you heard me. I agreed to go on a blind date that required at a 2 hour car ride each way, a 4 hour football game PLUS tailgating time. This is coming from a person that doesn’t even like for her dates to pick her up so she doesn’t have to talk to them in the car and use up precious conversation pieces on the way to a date and to avoid an awkward ride home if the date sucks.
The date called and followed up in an email. His emails were pretty funny all week so I felt fine about having so many hours to fill for a 1st blind date.
We were going to the game with another couple who were only on their second date so it was bound to be an interesting day. It poured (not hard rain) pouring, at one point I thought we were going to drive through a tornado, the entire drive to Athens. Of course, I didn’t think anything about bringing an umbrella, raincoat, nothing so I am totally unprepared for the weather. Luckily, my date was a total gentleman and prepared with a raincoat for me. He also had my fav beer, orange vodka for mixing with sprite during the game, etc. Because of the weather, we tailgated in the car. We were in a Tahoe with captain’s chairs so it wasn’t too crowded. The conversation was ok on the way up to Athens, not continuous or any crazy connection, but it was fine.
Funny story of the night…I wore thong shoes that had a canvas like bottom. Walking to the stadium was like wading through a river. At one point I looked down and my left shoe had soap suds all over it. I forgot that I had used spray in way to clean the bottom of the shoes and obviously didn’t wash all the spray and wash off. Anyway…it was funny to me but probably a “you have to be there moment.”
Our seats were club level in a box like setting so the weather had no impact on the enjoyment of the game. I am an avid sports fan – especially football, so it was fun to go to the game even though I didn’t have a vested interest in the outcome, plus I had a chance to show off my football knowledge.
All in all, the date was fine and nothing terrible. I was really tired by the end of the game and since it was a night game we didn’t get back to Atlanta until midnight. He was super nice, very funny and a total southern gentlemen but I see myself being friends with him and hanging out more than a romantic interest.
Don't do Double Date Blind Dates
One of my dear work friends set me up on a blind date with one of her husband’s friends. The original plan was to go to a martinis & swing dancing event with my friend and her husband. To an event like this, I felt like it was fine and would be more fun to go on a double date with another couple. HOWEVER, plans changed.
Due to the traffic in the Atl on Friday, which can often alter plans, everyone was running so late, it was decided we were just going to dinner instead because we were going to be too late to the event. Everyone met at my friend’s house (I was spending the night with them so I didn’t have to drive all the back to my house). From the second I walked in, my blind date was totally not interested in me. AT ALL. Not that I think am am hot stuff (only on certain nites), but he had absolutely no interest in me at all and didn’t pretend to – I can count on one hand how many times in the few hours we were together that he made eye contact. It was not a fun night. We went to dinner and the couple we were with and my date talked about all their mutual friends, old times, etc. I had little opportunity to jump in on the conversation. Each time my friend and I tried to shift the conversation so I could join in, it swayed back to something I could participate in.
It was very sweet of them to set me up and the night may have been very different if we had gone swing dancing, but this is a date with could not end soon enough.
Due to the traffic in the Atl on Friday, which can often alter plans, everyone was running so late, it was decided we were just going to dinner instead because we were going to be too late to the event. Everyone met at my friend’s house (I was spending the night with them so I didn’t have to drive all the back to my house). From the second I walked in, my blind date was totally not interested in me. AT ALL. Not that I think am am hot stuff (only on certain nites), but he had absolutely no interest in me at all and didn’t pretend to – I can count on one hand how many times in the few hours we were together that he made eye contact. It was not a fun night. We went to dinner and the couple we were with and my date talked about all their mutual friends, old times, etc. I had little opportunity to jump in on the conversation. Each time my friend and I tried to shift the conversation so I could join in, it swayed back to something I could participate in.
It was very sweet of them to set me up and the night may have been very different if we had gone swing dancing, but this is a date with could not end soon enough.
The Unexpected
Given all the random events and situations that have occurred over the past few months, I should be surprised by much, but I am taken off guard, confused and baffled by this situation.
An old friend of mine, that is probably more of an acquaintance than friend, and I have been trying to meet up for drinks for several weeks now, but our schedules haven’t jived. Old friend is someone I know through my ex-husband’s circle of friend – again not escaping the past.
We finally decided on a night to meet up for drinks which was planned for next week, but we were able to randomly meet up Thursday night of this week. He was out with friends and I met up with them after a work happy hour and dinner.
I will spare you the details of the night, but as the night progressed, I felt an odd vibe that Old Friend and I weren’t on the same page. I totally thought we were meeting up as friends, we are both recently divorced (me a lot more recent than him), see each other out, looking to expand our friend network, I have even tried to set him up with SWF, etc. To make a long story short, the night ended with us hanging out on his couch and him kissing me.
It has never even crossed my mind that would happen. Not that he isn’t a great guy and super cute, I have just never looked at him that way. I chalked it up to a late night event, but since then, he has sent several random texted, last night was fun, what are you up, stay in Athens tonight and go out with us (see next post to understand), etc. I have no idea if this will go anywhere. I am not sure what to even think, but I am going to roll with the situation.
I am not sure if he and I are still on for drinks this week but I have a feeling while it may not be this week or next, there will be more to come on this topic.
An old friend of mine, that is probably more of an acquaintance than friend, and I have been trying to meet up for drinks for several weeks now, but our schedules haven’t jived. Old friend is someone I know through my ex-husband’s circle of friend – again not escaping the past.
We finally decided on a night to meet up for drinks which was planned for next week, but we were able to randomly meet up Thursday night of this week. He was out with friends and I met up with them after a work happy hour and dinner.
I will spare you the details of the night, but as the night progressed, I felt an odd vibe that Old Friend and I weren’t on the same page. I totally thought we were meeting up as friends, we are both recently divorced (me a lot more recent than him), see each other out, looking to expand our friend network, I have even tried to set him up with SWF, etc. To make a long story short, the night ended with us hanging out on his couch and him kissing me.
It has never even crossed my mind that would happen. Not that he isn’t a great guy and super cute, I have just never looked at him that way. I chalked it up to a late night event, but since then, he has sent several random texted, last night was fun, what are you up, stay in Athens tonight and go out with us (see next post to understand), etc. I have no idea if this will go anywhere. I am not sure what to even think, but I am going to roll with the situation.
I am not sure if he and I are still on for drinks this week but I have a feeling while it may not be this week or next, there will be more to come on this topic.
Boss's Choice - North Carolina
So my boss set me up with a guy from NC. He is friends with my boss & another member of the executive committee at work and they both thought it would be a good match up. NC also works for one of my company's clients.
NC and I met for drinks at my fav watering hole, "The Regis" (haha, I am totally sick of going there but seem to end up there all the time). Of course with me nothing can be norm...he was in town for a couple days and had one of his investors with him. He still wanted to meet up, but had to bring his investor with him. Slightly weird that on a first, blind date I am going with my date and an investor in his company, but what is it going to hurt. Luckily, SBF pulled through in a clutch situation and met us for a couple drinks so it would be four people and not an odd three. I was very surprised and appreciative.
NC was a total southern gentleman, a wonderful accent and a great story teller. I really liked him a lot. He kept the entire group entertained, conversation flowing, etc. One of the characteristics I am looking for right.
While we were at The Regis, my ex-husband's father's best friend walked in. Seems like a long connection but it is not. We went on several family vacations together, spent holidays together,etc. I have seen him several times since the "D" and he has been nothing but nice and expressed that as long as I was happy all is good. I excuse myself from the table to say hello and speak to him and low and behold NC walks up to say hi as well. He knows him. NC is from over 5 hours away and another state and knows my ex-husband's father's best friend. Really! Can I please have my own life and leave the past behind me. Not a big deal and it broke the news that I was divorced. It's always weird about when to tell someone I am divorced but that situation took care of it for me.
SBF left fairly early in the night and the investor left a little while after that. NC ended up getting pretty drunk which was a little bit of a turn off for me, but in his defense, he had a really bad day.
He asked me to a fundraiser the next night, but it ended up not being a date thing and he was leaving town immediately after the benefit so it didn't work out, but he has already told me when he will be back in town and yes, my favorite has texted a few times. If he calls and comes back into town again, he is worth going out with again.
NC and I met for drinks at my fav watering hole, "The Regis" (haha, I am totally sick of going there but seem to end up there all the time). Of course with me nothing can be norm...he was in town for a couple days and had one of his investors with him. He still wanted to meet up, but had to bring his investor with him. Slightly weird that on a first, blind date I am going with my date and an investor in his company, but what is it going to hurt. Luckily, SBF pulled through in a clutch situation and met us for a couple drinks so it would be four people and not an odd three. I was very surprised and appreciative.
NC was a total southern gentleman, a wonderful accent and a great story teller. I really liked him a lot. He kept the entire group entertained, conversation flowing, etc. One of the characteristics I am looking for right.
While we were at The Regis, my ex-husband's father's best friend walked in. Seems like a long connection but it is not. We went on several family vacations together, spent holidays together,etc. I have seen him several times since the "D" and he has been nothing but nice and expressed that as long as I was happy all is good. I excuse myself from the table to say hello and speak to him and low and behold NC walks up to say hi as well. He knows him. NC is from over 5 hours away and another state and knows my ex-husband's father's best friend. Really! Can I please have my own life and leave the past behind me. Not a big deal and it broke the news that I was divorced. It's always weird about when to tell someone I am divorced but that situation took care of it for me.
SBF left fairly early in the night and the investor left a little while after that. NC ended up getting pretty drunk which was a little bit of a turn off for me, but in his defense, he had a really bad day.
He asked me to a fundraiser the next night, but it ended up not being a date thing and he was leaving town immediately after the benefit so it didn't work out, but he has already told me when he will be back in town and yes, my favorite has texted a few times. If he calls and comes back into town again, he is worth going out with again.
Catching up
A lot has transpired since my post last weekend. First, I have experienced two traumatic health events. Don't worry, everything is fine. I am on tons of meds for the first and the second was a one day event and I have recovered. Despite the speed bumps of my health, which seem to continue to haunt me, I managed to rack up 3 1st dates this week and had an interested unexpected hook up. Settle in for the update.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
No good news
Only bad news to report in this update. Unfortunately, I have to admit my failures as well as successes on this blog and I hate failure!!! This whole dating and meeting people situation is harder than I thought - especially when you work a lot and have very few single friends. Married people...you have to know more single people to set me up with!
1) No word from South Beach. I am dropping the whole South Beach obsession after this blog post.
2) The guy I was supposed to meet out last week never called to confirm plans. 2 blow offs within the month SUCKS!
Still waiting to see about the whole boss setting me up situation. Hopefully it will work out, but we'll have to see.
I am forging ahead and hope October will be a better month... just need to get through the rest of September and put myself back out there. I am staying positive. On that note, congrats to my AU Tigers on their win last night. It wasn't pretty, but a win's a win :)
1) No word from South Beach. I am dropping the whole South Beach obsession after this blog post.
2) The guy I was supposed to meet out last week never called to confirm plans. 2 blow offs within the month SUCKS!
Still waiting to see about the whole boss setting me up situation. Hopefully it will work out, but we'll have to see.
I am forging ahead and hope October will be a better month... just need to get through the rest of September and put myself back out there. I am staying positive. On that note, congrats to my AU Tigers on their win last night. It wasn't pretty, but a win's a win :)
Friday, September 18, 2009
Top 10 list of what I am looking for in a guy
First things first…I am not looking for a serious relationship any time soon, but everyone keeps asking me what kind of person I like and my therapist suggested I make a list of the qualities I am looking for in someone (and write them down) so I can revisit to make sure I don’t stray too far from what I want
Here we go…
1) Gainfully employed – preferably a white collar occupation
2) Independent – I don’t do needy. I like my space and freedom and do not want to be with someone who is insecure, needs hand holding. Respect my time and space and I will respect yours.
3) Athletic or at least takes time to work out and keep his body in shape
4) Social – I need a guy that can go to a party, carry on a conversation and doesn’t need a babysitter the entire night. I want to be with the life of the party, the guy people want to invite because he is fun and keeps the conversations going and interesting.
5) Family oriented – this does not mean I want to be with a guy that wants/has kids. It is important to me to be with someone who has a good relationship with his family (including siblings). In the event that I introduce someone to my family, it is important that they slide right in to my environment and feel comfortable with my family.
6) Has a hobby – Back to #2, I don’t want to spend all my time with someone and need my space. Have a hobby that I don’t participate in is a necessity. It gives me the time to do things I enjoy
7) Religious – I am not saying you have to be holier than thou, just have some religious inclinations or be spiritual.
8) Strong - not necessarily physically but emotionally. I have a strong personality and need to be with someone that is stronger than me. Yes, as much as I hate to admit it, at the end of the day, I want someone to take care of me.
9) No addictions – cannot be an alcoholic, recovering drug addict or smoker (cigar smoking is ok)
10)Likes to experience new things– I am up for almost anything. We only live life once and I don’t want to miss out on anything. I want to be with someone who isn’t afraid to travel to new places, try new restaurants, talk to strangers, do something unusual. What fun is it to be confined by the rules and expectations of others. If you feel like doing something, do it (unless it is harmful to others).
Here we go…
1) Gainfully employed – preferably a white collar occupation
2) Independent – I don’t do needy. I like my space and freedom and do not want to be with someone who is insecure, needs hand holding. Respect my time and space and I will respect yours.
3) Athletic or at least takes time to work out and keep his body in shape
4) Social – I need a guy that can go to a party, carry on a conversation and doesn’t need a babysitter the entire night. I want to be with the life of the party, the guy people want to invite because he is fun and keeps the conversations going and interesting.
5) Family oriented – this does not mean I want to be with a guy that wants/has kids. It is important to me to be with someone who has a good relationship with his family (including siblings). In the event that I introduce someone to my family, it is important that they slide right in to my environment and feel comfortable with my family.
6) Has a hobby – Back to #2, I don’t want to spend all my time with someone and need my space. Have a hobby that I don’t participate in is a necessity. It gives me the time to do things I enjoy
7) Religious – I am not saying you have to be holier than thou, just have some religious inclinations or be spiritual.
8) Strong - not necessarily physically but emotionally. I have a strong personality and need to be with someone that is stronger than me. Yes, as much as I hate to admit it, at the end of the day, I want someone to take care of me.
9) No addictions – cannot be an alcoholic, recovering drug addict or smoker (cigar smoking is ok)
10)Likes to experience new things– I am up for almost anything. We only live life once and I don’t want to miss out on anything. I want to be with someone who isn’t afraid to travel to new places, try new restaurants, talk to strangers, do something unusual. What fun is it to be confined by the rules and expectations of others. If you feel like doing something, do it (unless it is harmful to others).
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
I'm Back!
I am back! Hopefully I haven't lost the interest of too many people during my short break (I doubt it since I am sure only a couple people follow the blog). I have been consumed with work & BFF's wedding. Her wedding was this weekend - it was beautiful & amazing! Only downside is there were not any cute single guys at the wedding :( bummer. Actually there were three, but one friend just broke up with , one is dating another friend and I am pretty sure the third hasn't made it past puberty.
So what has been going on...not much, but I am jumping back in the game.
Update on South Beach...he texted me the night after we met a few times, but I haven't heard from him since that night. I wanted to chalk it up to Labor Day, but at this point I have written him off, deleted him from my phone, but part of me still hopes he calls when he is coming back to the ATL.
My boss is setting me up with a client (not one of mine obviously) who lives out of town. I am beginning to think this is my preference. If I don't like them, slim chance of running into them again and if I do like them, there is a buffer so I don't have to see too much if them and it keeps things interesting. I will keep you posted on the progress of my boss setting me up. Please don't think I am desperate for dates since I have resorted to my boss setting me up - he is young and fun.
I have a tentative date tomorrow night with a guy I met out a month or so ago . We talked last Friday and penciled in tomorrow. Hopefully he calls tonight to firm up plans - if not, it will be my second blow off in two weeks. Yikes! Things are on the downturn for me if that happens.
Other than that, I have a couple set ups friends are working on, but not much going on. I am traveling for the next several weekends and am worried about my date pipeline! At this point, I doubt there is anyway I am going to hit 25 1st dates, or 25 dates period, but I am still working to achieve the goal. Feel free to send any single, eligible guys my way.
Off to yoga.
So what has been going on...not much, but I am jumping back in the game.
Update on South Beach...he texted me the night after we met a few times, but I haven't heard from him since that night. I wanted to chalk it up to Labor Day, but at this point I have written him off, deleted him from my phone, but part of me still hopes he calls when he is coming back to the ATL.
My boss is setting me up with a client (not one of mine obviously) who lives out of town. I am beginning to think this is my preference. If I don't like them, slim chance of running into them again and if I do like them, there is a buffer so I don't have to see too much if them and it keeps things interesting. I will keep you posted on the progress of my boss setting me up. Please don't think I am desperate for dates since I have resorted to my boss setting me up - he is young and fun.
I have a tentative date tomorrow night with a guy I met out a month or so ago . We talked last Friday and penciled in tomorrow. Hopefully he calls tonight to firm up plans - if not, it will be my second blow off in two weeks. Yikes! Things are on the downturn for me if that happens.
Other than that, I have a couple set ups friends are working on, but not much going on. I am traveling for the next several weekends and am worried about my date pipeline! At this point, I doubt there is anyway I am going to hit 25 1st dates, or 25 dates period, but I am still working to achieve the goal. Feel free to send any single, eligible guys my way.
Off to yoga.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
South Beach
Last night I met a great guy at happy hour. I noticed him pretty early into happy hour, but I never saw him look my way so I didn’t think he was interested. A friend of mine happened to be at the bar with another group and she knew I thought he was cute. She introduced herself (telling him I was interested) and me to him. We chatted for a while over drinks and he invited me to dinner.
We went to dinner with my friend and one of his co-workers. After dinner they went home and he and I stayed at the bar for a few more drinks. When that bar shut down, we went to the Ritz for another drink and talked for a while. I don’t even remember what time I went home but it was late. I had a great time with him and really, really hope he calls. He sent me a text on his way to the airport this morning telling me it was nice to meet me. If he wasn’t interested, why would he send a text? Right…
He lives in South Beach and was in town for business. Said he comes back often so maybe something could work out. I am actually excited about this one…cute, mid-30s, social, picked out a good wine, funny, has a job, likes to travel, likes to go out, shall I go on?
BTW…I am counting dinner as one of my dates – know it’s a stretch, but he did ask me to dinner.
We went to dinner with my friend and one of his co-workers. After dinner they went home and he and I stayed at the bar for a few more drinks. When that bar shut down, we went to the Ritz for another drink and talked for a while. I don’t even remember what time I went home but it was late. I had a great time with him and really, really hope he calls. He sent me a text on his way to the airport this morning telling me it was nice to meet me. If he wasn’t interested, why would he send a text? Right…
He lives in South Beach and was in town for business. Said he comes back often so maybe something could work out. I am actually excited about this one…cute, mid-30s, social, picked out a good wine, funny, has a job, likes to travel, likes to go out, shall I go on?
BTW…I am counting dinner as one of my dates – know it’s a stretch, but he did ask me to dinner.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
